Now that you are married, you must be apprehensive about how your relationship with your mother-in-law will turn out. But, what you do not realise is that your mother-in-law is equally uncertain about it. After all, her relationship with her son is never going to be the same again. She will also have to deal with a new person entering the house and perhaps taking over her place. So, let us reveal secrets about every mother-in-law’s insecurities (post-marriage), and how you can deal with them.
‘I feel like I am being downsized’
As a newlywed, you would definitely want to cook your husband’s favourite delicacies, and charm him with your culinary skills. But in the process, you literally take over the kitchen which has always been your mom-in-law’s power centre.
What you should do: Make her taste the food you make and ask for her opinion. You can, at times, pretend that you do not know everything about culinary techniques. Do not hesitate to seek her help. She will definitely feel good about it.
‘I feel my son is ignoring me’
Your husband, who would earlier come back home and sit with his mother for hours, is now spending most of his time with you. You have just got married and it is quite natural to behave like a lovestruck couple, going out on dates or for movies. Mother-in-laws often feel neglected in such a scenario.
What you should do: Do not let your mom-in-law feel left out. Ask your husband to take out time for his mother as well. You can also take her out to her favourite places once in a while. Such gestures will make her feel much wanted.
‘My son does not seek my advice anymore’
Before you tied the knot, your husband would go to his mom for any sort of advice. But after marriage, your spouse might not even involve her opinion in any of the major decisions. It is your responsibility to make your husband understand that her mother is still the the eldest in the family, and her decisions really matter.
What you should do: If you are thinking of buying an insurance scheme or investing in a house, ask your husband to seek her advice. Giving her a chance to voice her opinions will make her feel an important part of the family.
‘I am treated like a guest at my son’s house’
Every time your mom-in-law visits your house, you go into a panic mode. You try to cook the best food and clean up the entire house to impress her. But, your mother-in-law is not a guest for whom you have to dress up your house. Sometimes you try too hard that the strain is clearly visible on your face.
What you should do: Treat her like your own family member. She just wants to spend some quality time with both of you. So, learn to relax when she is around.
Now that you know how a mother-in-law usually feels, it is your responsibility to make her feel special and very much wanted. Take the lead and give your mother-in-law the same love you would give to your own mother.
‘My daughter-in-law does not use my presents’
Has your mother-in-law gifted you a dress, which you did not like at all? Or maybe a dinner set, which you think is too gaudy? Many brides just shove these presents in a closet and forget about them. But sadly, their mom-in-laws do not. She would probably be waiting for you to use her present some day.
What you should do: Even if you do not like a present given by her, you should use it at least once. It will definitely make her feel happy and respected. After all, it is the thought that matters!