Weddings have become a very costly affair and a mere business deal among many families today. Some men even claim that they never wanted dowry but were forced to accept it by their parents. If these men had any convictions, they would not have allowed their parents to get away with it. It is surprising to see men, who are perceived to be strong-willed, turn into spineless meat when it comes to taking a stand against their dowry-seeking parents. Dowry is an illness that must be cured, if we want our country to be a world power.
It is highly shameful that even as India has positioned itself as an emergency global superpower, practices such as dowry continue to plague our society. Many young men claim that they don’t believe in the practice of accepting dowry but tolerate it on their family’s instance. How can the youth of today, so loudly demanding about the causes they believe in, allow dowry to continue even without a murmur of protest?
Even educated people indulge in this practice and many marriages have been called off as the bride’s parents have been unable to meet the exorbitant demands made by the groom’s parents, leaving so many young women in a state of emotional turmoil. Dowry is the money or gifts given to a daughter by her parents at the time of her marriage. The boy’s family considers it as their right to make demands and a lot of unpleasantness is caused at the time of marriage. Sometimes people even call off the marriage if the dowry amount received by them is inadequate.
The girl is also very often tortured by the husband and his family members for not bringing enough dowry. Sometimes she is even compelled to commit suicide to escape ill-treatment. Worse still, people even resort to murder to eliminate a bride who has not brought enough dowries. Who do you blame for the practice of dowry in India? It starts in our homes itself. The very set of parents that demand dowry become the victims during the time of their own daughter’s marriage. Behind every case of dowry there is also a mother-in-law or sister-in-law.
Mind set and beliefs don’t change easily and the only way to address them is through education and awareness. These measures yield results over a period of time. It’s time we stood up and smell the stink. If we don’t take a stand today, our daughter could very well be the next victim. Think! The Kerala government’s decision to bring a bill to curb expensive and lavish wedding ceremonies in the state is laudable. The girl’s parents’ who cannot afford to spend lump sum money is made to feel inferior. On an average, even a middle class family has to shell out fifteen to twenty lakh rupees for arranging a wedding ceremony. It is a huge sum of money for a middle class family. The situation even worsens further if the family has two girls and the father is nearing retirement age. Dowry and expensive wedding celebrations are responsible for increasing corruption besides being a social evil. Providing your daughter with a solid education and encouraging her to pursue a career of her choice is the best dowry any parent can ever give to their daughter. Think again!!
Jubel D’Cruz
