People’s mindset about dowry remains unchanged


I have no idea but yes I am coming across some serious heartbreaking cases. My sister had come home for a week’s holiday. However, this time I knew that she was worrying about something and would definitely speak about it. The glow which I had seen on her face last time was missing. I knew that the issue was related with her longtime boyfriend, who hails from Pune in short a Punekar. He is pursuing MS in USA whereas my sister is completing her Masters degree in Pune itself.

I observed that she was finding it extremely uncomfortable while interacting with people but she was somehow managing it. While having a conversation with her for several hours, I realised that something is wrong with the society. I don’t have any idea who is responsible for it.

The reason why my sister planned to back out of the relationship was that she knew that her father can’t afford to pay dowry. I was surprised to learn that a 22 year old girl could think about dowries. Since her boyfriend is studying overseas hence his parents are expecting a huge dowry from bride’s parents. It is very difficult for highly qualified girls to find an equivalent match for them.

Do you think is it really justified for somebody to demand dowry despite being highly qualified? Is it the right age to really think about dowry when someone hails from a wealthy family and can afford overseas education? A question which arises in my mind is if parents are demanding dowry then why nobody would have raised a hue and cry about it.

In the beginning it was really a bit difficult for me to believe so I asked my sister to make her stand very clear with him. Accordingly, she followed my instruction and texted her boyfriend stating that she is well educated to say no to dowry. My sister also added that it won’t be possible for her to convince her father to arrange for the dowry amount just because she is in a relationship.

We were surprised to receive his text saying, “Are you mad? Who is demanding Rs 10 to 20 lakhs from you?” He might be hinting at four or five lakhs.

She said there were many instances when he would tell her, “I am pursuing my higher education and I will get any girl who will pay dowry and my mother will never compromise on this aspect. In our family there is a tradition of giving and accepting dowry and we will follow the same practice.”

Just imagine about a 22 year old speaking such about a topic like dowry which is really terrifying situation of India, which is yet to be highlighted. Men have all courage to think about dowry. Since they are typical momma’s boy they don’t possess the guts to change their parents thinking. They don’t have the guts to accept love in its original form and don’t know to loves selflessly. It is a bitter truth.

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